4 poor communication skills (and what to do about them)

Rachael Roberts
People of various backgrounds and ages standing together holding paper speech bubbles

How to help your students improve their general listening, speaking and understanding

Do your students ever display poor communication skills?

Most teachers will answer with a resounding ‘yes’. In fact, communication skills do not always come naturally to many people. Let’s look at some of the most common and egregious errors people make when speaking and listening to each other. I’ll also give you some valuable ways to help your students improve.

1. They 诲辞苍’迟 even stop to breathe

If you find one student doing a LOT of talking, it’s probably because no one else can get a word in edgeways. It can be tempting to assume that this is because the chatty student thinks their ideas are better than anyone else’s, but, in fact, it is often a sign of nerves.

Look more carefully and see if they appear breathless or anxious. Whatever the reason, this kind of student may benefit from a more structured approach where students are given time to prepare what they are going to say, and everyone is expected to contribute equally. Or make it into a game where students have to make sure that they speak for 50% of the time each, as would be expected in an exam situation.

2. They aren’t really paying attention to each other

Whether your students are looking at their phones, staring out of the window or can’t wait to interrupt each other, poor listeners make poor communicators. Deal with this by always requiring the listener in any pair to do something specific. For example, tell them they will need to summarise what their partner said, or they have to think of three questions to ask their partner at the end.

We usually have a reason to listen in real-life communication, so make sure you give them one. Otherwise, they may assume that only the teacher needs to pay attention when another student is talking.

3. They ramble and it’s difficult to follow what they’re saying

Students may ramble because they are unconfident about the target language. It’s fine for students to struggle a bit to communicate, but it’s sensible to set achievable tasks, or they may give up.

It could also be that they would benefit from more rehearsal and practice. Being able to speak fluently ‘off the cuff’ is very challenging, particularly in front of an audience. Try giving students time to plan what they are going to say first. They shouldn’t be reading off the page, but writing it first can help with confidence and fluency.

Repetition is also invaluable in building fluency. Try doing speaking tasks more than once, and see how the quality and quantity improves each time. You can ring the changes by swapping partners or changing the format from pairs to small groups, to the whole class.

4. They 诲辞苍’迟 treat others’ feelings with respect

This can show itself in different ways. Maybe your students just completely ignore the feelings the other person is demonstrating or telling them about. Or maybe they dismiss them in other ways, ‘Oh, exactly the same thing happened to me! I was just walking along…’

You can model better ways to respond yourself. For example, “It sounds as if you feel quite angry about that?”, “That must have been really difficult.’

This teaches students the kind of phrases they can use to validate, empathize and talk about emotions.

If you can deal with these problems, your students will be well on the way to becoming master communicators.

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    It was an embarrassing reminder that communication norms are constantly changing, as are the technologies we use. Younger generations share contact information on their phones’ social media apps, not with business cards. A similar shift has been the move away from business cards featuring fax numbers. “What’s a fax?” my son might ask.

    Fax machines have had a surprisingly long life–the first fax machine was invented in 1843–but they have been largely retired because it’s easier to send images of documents via email attachments.

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    Changing technologies challenge language teachers who struggle to prepare students with the formats and the strategies they need to be effective in academic, business, and social settings. These challenges start with questions about why we have particular norms around communication. These norms form a culture of communication.

    The artist/musician Brian Eno defines culture as what we 诲辞苍’迟 have to do. We may have to walk, but we 诲辞苍’迟 have to dance. Dancing, therefore, is culture. Communication is full of cultural practices that we 诲辞苍’迟 strictly need to do, but which make communication more successful. These include practices based on the 55/38/7 Rule and The Three Cs.

    The 55/38/7 rule is often misinterpreted as being about what someone hears when we speak. It actually refers to the insights of University of California professor, , who looked at how our attitudes, feelings, and beliefs influence our trust in what someone says.

    Mehrabian suggests words only account for seven percent of a message’s impact; tone of voice makes up 38 percent, and body language–including facial expressions–account for the other 55 percent. The consequence of this for our students is that it’s sometimes not so important what they are saying as how they are saying it.

    Another way of looking at this nonverbal communication is in terms of The Three Cs: context, clusters, and congruence.?

    Context is about the environment in which communication takes place, any existing relationship between the speakers, and the roles they have. Imagine how each of these factors change if, for example, you met a surgeon at a party compared to meeting the same surgeon in an operating theater where you are about to have your head sawn open.

    Clusters are the sets of body language expressions that together make up a message; smiling while walking toward someone is far different than smiling while carefully backing away.

    Congruence refers to how body language matches–or doesn’t match–a speaker’s words. People saying, “Of course! It’s possible!” while unconsciously shaking their heads from side to side are perhaps being less than truthful.

    How does a culture of communication practices translate to new technologies? Mobile phone texts, just like 19th-century telegraph messages before them, need to be precise in conveying their meaning.

    In virtual meetings (on Teams and Google Hangouts, for example), students need to understand that tone of voice, facial expressions, and body language may be more important than the words they share.

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    An additional key concern in virtual meetings is politeness. Once, in preparation for a new textbook, I was involved in soliciting topics of interest to university teachers. I was surprised that several teachers identified the need to teach politeness. The teachers pointed out that the brevity of social media meant that students were often unwittingly rude in their requests (typical email: “Where’s my grade!”). Moreover, such abruptness was crossing over to their in-person interactions.

    Politeness includes civility, getting along with others, as well as deference, showing respect to those who may have earned it through age, education, and achievement. But politeness is also related to strategies around persuasion and how to listen actively, engage with other speakers by clarifying and elaborating points and ask a range of question types. Online or in person, if students cannot interrupt politely or know when it is better to listen, whatever they have to say will be lost in the court of bad opinion.

    This is particularly important in preparation for academic and business contexts where students need to interact in groups, such as seminar settings and business meetings. Within these, it’s necessary for students to be able to take on a variety of roles, including leadership, taking notes, and playing devil’s advocate to challenge what a group thinks.

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    Role-play can help raise awareness of these strategies among students, but it’s not enough to just take on a variety of roles found in common academic and business exchanges; students need to be able to reflect after each role-play session and infer what strategies are successful.

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    Make your own video

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    Step 3 Share your video. Answer questions and get feedback.

    This simple project subconsciously reinforces the unit’s vocabulary and grammar. It also allows students to personalize the project based on things that they need to talk about in daily life–their local foods in this case. This means that each student’s presentation is unique. Unlike with essay assignments, students tend to work hard to craft several versions until they are satisfied because they know their work will be seen by other students and that they will be asked questions that only they can answer.

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